I am not a bird

I'm sorry I keep changing my blog title i just keep thinking of good things to put
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Poe’s Law: That moment when a Fox Business commentator sounds just like a Disney villain.

kouje:

remolupin:

my headcanon sirius has a magic tattoo of a moon on his upper left shoulder and it changes to match the phase of the moon so he never forgets even in azkaban bye

this is the worst thing to ever happen to me

Posted 2 hours ago With 57,906 notes

awwww-cute:

Newest addition to the family!

importerrobinson:

izzatso:

Misato, who has been previously hired by her High School to rid their auditorium of pigeons, asserts that her falcon, Momotaro, will get the job done.

“The falcon is a divine punishment against crows. When their eyes meet the glare of the falcon, they will definitely not return” she says without a single doubt in her mind.

Japan’s Schoolgirl Falconer Is Incredibly Badass [Japanator]

that quote omfg lmao

homohustle:

jotarokujo:

what if the new animal species we discover each year are actually being dropped off by aliens? like they have an over abundance of yeti crabs or something and so they brought some to earth because they knew we’d get a kick out of this

image

This is the cutest conspiracy theory I’ve ever heard

Posted 4 hours ago With 23,897 notes

datagoddess:

This is a good reason to always carry sidewalk chalk in the car.

poopflow:

after learning about transphobia and misogyny and etc its so uncomfortable to be around any person thats not educated on these issues in real life  

Posted 4 hours ago With 5,361 notes

lameborghini:

lameborghini:

my physics teacher loves april fools day

i told him that his joke got 90 thousand notes on the internet and he was like “wow!! 90 thousand people think im funny” (he always makes bad jokes in class and no one laughs) and he was smiling really big it was so cute

chippychime:

when your fri ends say that their art isnt goo d

image

Posted 4 hours ago With 57,443 notes

class-snuggle:

My roommate bought a pack of 24 rolls of toilet paper yesterday, in addition to the half dozen we already had, and stored all of them in the bathroom. And just let me tell you, there’s something incredibly calming and reassuring about looking next to you while you’re on the toilet and seeing 30 rolls of toilet paper sitting there. You get a feeling like, no matter how bad shit gets in there, you’re always going to make it out okay in the end.

Posted 4 hours ago With 4,716 notes

maureenstarkeys:

cheap clothing sites ($10 and over; most are under $20):

Posted 4 hours ago With 8,078 notes

heyfunniest:

is this even a kid show

beginner993:

221cbakerstreet:

fightfromtheinside17:

Freddie Mercury’s vocal range, ladies and gentlemen.

We are not worthy

fuckin how